Birthing Classes

I finally got my birthing class scheduled. It's the next four Mondays (November 1, 8, 15, & 22) from 7-9. I don't know who's going with me. Either Paul or Dad. Whoever isn't busy, I guess.

27 Weeks

Today marks the beginning of 27 weeks. The last week of trimester number two. Woo hoo!

I finally was able to buy myself a couple pairs of jeans. The one pair of maternity pants I bought was capris. It's starting to get colder outside and we'll be going to Iowa in a few weeks so I thought it was time to buy some jeans to cover my ankles. My old jeans are too tight anymore to wear. My last pair of jeans that could were buttonable are no longer able to button. I have to wear a hair tie around the button.

I also bought two baby blankets today. Very soft. A brown one and a green one. Time's running out and I'm slowly getting more stuff for Benton. It's all so overwhelming on what to get. I really need to start saving money to get the big stuff (stroller, car seat, etc) instead of buying all this little stuff. Ugh! Stress.

And last but not least, one more pregnancy symptom that I've noticed. I drool. I drooled before but not like I do now. I wake up and my pillow is soaked. Definitely going to have to buy pillow protectors.

Braxton Hicks

Today I have done absolutely nothing but contract. I've officially begun to notice Braxton Hicks contractions. They don't hurt at all. But all day I've been feeling my belly tighten up and I get somewhat uncomfortable. They come at what seems to be a regular pace (the exact pace I don't know because I'm not keeping track) and far apart. I'm not worried at all but it is definitely something new to me.

Diaper Party

Today we had our diaper party. It was really quite fun! I enjoyed getting to spend time with the people closest to me. It was Paul and I, Joe and Rebecca, Mom and Dad, the Grewicks, and the Jenns. Later on Bernice, her daughter, and Keyshia showed up to visit. We got tons of diapers and baby wipes. It'll definitely put us off to a good start. The cake was extremely yummy. Paul and I fought over the icing, a) because it was good, and b) because it turns your mouth blue.

The Grewicks won the raffle. The prize was a coupon book with coupons for a lawn mowing, car wash, redbox rental, and a couple other things.

Joe won the poker tournament. He won bragging rights.

It was a very fun day. Even though people didn't show up when they said they would, we still made the most of it.

Secret Project

I took the horse shoe shaped cake pan back to Hobby Lobby today. It was awesome but at the same time, since I'm so stressed about having people over Sunday, I don't want to make a cake on top of everything else I need to do. So I will be buying a cake from HEB.

Which brings me to my next point: I completed a secret project today. While I was at Hobby Lobby, I couldn't resist looking around. I've always wanted to put my baby's name on his or her wall. So I found some stencils and paint and kept myself occupied for a good couple hours today. It'll be right above his crib. It's brown on bottom faded to white on top. I'm contemplating whether or not to outline it in black. The edges are kind of rough looking but then again, it's got the rustic feel to it. So I don't know. But it was nice to have a little fun project to do for once. And it checked one more thing off my baby to-do list.

And in my process of being miserable yesterday, I deleted the baby guessing game. It was just one more thing for me to keep track of.

And, as always, another belly picture. I got bored laying in bed last night so I took some pictures.

25w3d

Blowing Off Steam

I need to vent. Bad.

So I decided we should have a diaper party. Me. No one else. I was going to throw one for just Paul and the guys but figured it would be more fun if me and my -2 friends could come, too. So we're having a party this weekend. Do we have the money? I don't know. Has anyone RSVPed? No. Am I pissed? Yes. Am I offended? Yes. Will anyone actually show up besides my parents? I don't know. Will I have enough food if people do decide to come? I don't know. Will I be spending more money on throwing this thing than what I'll get out of it? More than likely. Am I thrilled about having to make my own cake and food? No. Is my house going to take forever to clean? Yes.

And Paul finally got his orders yesterday for deployment. Even though my parents will be with me when Benton is born, I am still scared shitless to have him gone. I want him here. I can't stop crying every day when I think about it. Literally, every day I cry now. I don't want him to go. We tried so hard and so freaking long for this day to get here. And when it does, he's going to be gone. I feel this big empty hole in my heart and in the pit of my stomach. There's always the possibility of webcam or video taping. But it's not the same. I want him here to catch the baby. To cry with me. To laugh with me. To love with me. But he's not. And I'm fucking pissed and scared and a million other emotions at once. And again, I'm crying.

I'm scared to death to bring Benton home. I'm going to be alone. My husband won't be here to stop my crying. And I know for a fact that that's all I'll do. I have to go a whole year of raising a child by myself - when I'm married! I don't want to. I don't want my husband to miss all of his firsts and some of his lasts. He will never be this little again and Paul won't be here to experience it.

I want to rip my hair out right now. I'm crying. I need a hug but can't get one. I want to crawl into bed and let the world go on without me for a little while. I'm stressed to the max. This sucks.

Chunky Monkey

Today I had another prenatal checkup. Heartbeat was good. Fundal height was good. I gained 7 pounds in four weeks. Yes, I said it, 7 pounds. I was 207 at the last appointment, and obviously if you add 7, I now weight 214. The doctor said that was a little much but since I'm only back at my pre-pregnancy weight, he's not too worried about it. I told him my baby's a chunky monkey and that's why I gained so much.

Next appointment is on November 10th. Two days before my 23rd birthday. I get to get a glucose screening. Yuck! I've had one before and didn't enjoy it. I don't forsee myself enjoying it this time either.

Symptoms

I have now developed what I would like to call "End of second trimester pregnancy symptoms". They include, but are not limited to:

• Dry skin
• Feeling hot the majority of the time
• Stuffy sounding breathing while sleeping
• Inability to reach my own body parts
• Ability to burp (for those of you who know me well, I absolutely cannot burp)
• Two leaky breasts instead of just one
• Inability to accept how I look
• Constant hunger except when it's an actual meal time
• Mid-day drowsiness
• Inability to not offend people
• Forgetfulness

Again, they include but are not limited to the previously mentioned items.

But I do it all for you baby Benton! And I'd do it all over again if I had to. ♥

Celebration

Since Paul and I don't really have a whole lot of friends and family here in Texas, we can't really have a baby shower or men-only baby shower. So we're having a co-ed diaper party. That way all of our friends and family can come celebrate the baby's nearing arrival.

Rebecca has been more than gracious helping me out with decorations and cake ideas. She's also the "RSVP Lady". We picked out some red (sorry, Hobby Lobby didn't have blue) handkerchief napkins and plates and will be making a horseshoe shaped cake with toy horses on top. We're also hanging red and white streamers around the house. When everything is complete and set up I will take pictures.

I made the invitations myself. They were printed on blue cardstock at Office Depot. Cost me a whopping $4.00 for 40 invitations. :-D

We came up with a couple things to do for the diaper party. The main event will be poker (see invitation). The other is a raffle. I still haven't figured out what we'll be raffling off but I was thinking 2 tickets for putt putt golf and a gift card to Dairy Queen sounded good (ice cream after a date?). I don't know yet. And maybe a $10 gift card somewhere for the winner of the poker game.

We're going to make the food, too. Nothing too hard. Just making little sandwiches.

I'm kind of nervous. It's one of those, "What if no one comes?" things. I just hope we have a great turnout so we can at least spend one "last" day hanging out with friends. Diapers would be a plus, but having everyone over for a good time would be the best gift ever.

Another Picture

24w5d

Gaining

I swear to God, when I weighed myself this morning, the scale said I gained 10 pounds. I'm almost back to my original weight. I guess that's not too bad. At least it's baby-belly weight and not belly-roll weight. :-)

Bumper

I went to the Goodwill today to look for a longer cord to hook our modem up to. I found one. Then I decided to browse around to see if I could find anything cute for Benton's room. In the curtain/bedding section I found an awesome bumper for the crib. Since we're decorating the room western-ish, I thought it would be perfect. I wasn't going to use a bumper but when I found it, I just had to get it.

$3.99 at the Goodwill

He's Growing!

Today I had another in-depth ultrasound. It wasn't as long as the last one but of course, it was still fun to watch.

Benton was moving around quite a bit, like he normally does. He's a swimmer! Haha!

The lady took some measurements of him. He had "normal" legs and measured about a week ahead on his arms and head, and his belly (if I remember correctly) measured two weeks ahead. I didn't get a length but he's estimated to weigh one pound, eleven ounces. He's a little chunker!

The doctor had no concerns over how the ultrasound looked or how he was growing. Benton is still a healthy, active baby boy (and yes, it was confirmed AGAIN that he's still a he).

23w3d

Ultrasound photos will be uploaded later.

My Little Benny Bunny Baby

We have finally decided on a name.

Benton Michael Nebel

A short while ago, I had sent Paul a message on Facebook telling him I was upset about not picking a name yet. After he read it (a week after I sent it), we sat in the living room and picked names. I Googled "Western Boy Names". I kind of rattled the list off and Paul said yes or no. We couldn't find anything on the first website we found. On the second website, we found two. I don't recall the second name. But one of the names was Benton. And of course, of the two, we picked Benton.

Since then, I've been able to comfortable call the baby Benton when I talk to him. And I told a few people about the name. It's different but not too different. Just right.

I've been contemplating having a shortened name for him: Ben. But I don't know. I'm not much of a "Ben" person and my nephew's dad's name is Ben. Also, I don't want people thinking his name is Benjamin. So I think the shortened version is going to be a no-go. I do, however, sometimes call him my Lil Benny Bunny Baby. It's just fun to say.

Anywho, so Paul and I were sitting on the couch this morning before he went to work and I was cruising the internet. I went by my blog to check up on it and told him about me writing a letter to Baby. He sort of caught a glimpse of me saying, "That's all Daddy's doing". So I explained to him that I apologized in the letter because I was writing to Baby and not a named child. He says, "He has a name!" I was like, "We never said it was official." And he was kind of like, "It's Benton."

So now we have a named baby.

I love my Little Benny Bunny Baby

We can't wait to meet you, Benton! ♥

Dear Baby,

Dear Baby,

First off, I'd like to apologize for not having a name for you yet. That's all Daddy's doing. I feel weird writing a letter to Baby instead of my named child.

I just wanted to write you to let you know how I feel and how I hope to feel. You mean the world to me and nothing will ever change that. It's the most awesome and amazing feeling getting to feel you growing rapidly inside my belly and inside my heart. I'm loving every minute of it, from the kicks and thumps, to the non-stop urge to pee because it feels like your toenails are scratching my bladder.

Every day I imagine what it will be like when the time comes to give birth. I often cry tears of joy thinking about it. I also think about your first birthday. And what you'll look like when you grow up. And who you'll become. And all the other things in between.

I hope to be the best mom you could ever wish and hope for. I know we're not going to like each other at times, but I'll always love you. And I know that at other times, we'll be inseperable. I hope to be able to comfort you when you need it most and to guide you when you've lost your way. I hope to show you how to do everything the right way but I hope to not do everything for you. I want you to be you. Not me. Not Dad.

I hope to be able to provide for you all the necessities and then some. Diapers. Food. School clothes. Sports uniforms. College books. The whole nine yards. I hope you gain positive self-esteem and confidence in all you do.

Also, ahead of time, I'd like to apologise. This is my first time doing any of this. I'm new. Just like you're new to the world, I'm going to be new to the world of parenting. I will make mistakes. I will try my hardest not to, but I know I will. And Daddy will. And you will, too. But that's okay. We're all new at this together and can learn from each other.

All in all, I want you to become the greatest person known to mankind. If you can't get that far, at least know you'll be the greatest person to me. No matter what.

I love you with all my heart.

Always and forever,

Mommy ♥

I'm Clothed!

Yay! I have clothes on in these pictures! Woo hoo! Hahahaha! I figured I'd take another belly picture or two.

22w1d

?

Benton Michael Nebel?

Thank you!

So I got more baby stuff from Courtney yesterday. I swear, she's furnished 9/10 of the baby's room. I am so very grateful and blessed to have her in my life. She gave us a Diaper Genie and a high chair. Thank you sooooooo much Courtney!

Names.... Again

My husband is starting to get on my nerves. Remember how I wrote about me picking out names and then him editing the list even more? Well, we went out to eat with Courtney last night and I said, "Can you help us pick a name? We're debating between Grady Michael and Michael Grady." Then Paul chimes in saying "I hate Grady." What the.... ? Really?! That upset me because I was trying my hardest to refer to the baby as Grady (instead of Baby) as much as possible when we're alone. So I said, "What about Callum?" "Callum?! What the hell kind of name is that?!" "You left it on the list!!!!!!" "Well, I don't like it."

If I ask Paul what names he likes, I always get "I don't know." And that's it.

So we're back to square one. Again.

Braxton Hicks Contractions

I think I just had my very first Braxton Hicks contraction. It was like this tightening between my belly button and pubic bone. It was kinda weird.

Nursing Bras

Yay for bras my boobies fit in!

I got paid today so I was finally able to go buy some new bras. I was spilling out of my old ones. I went to the mall and got two of the same kind from Motherhood Maternity (the one in the picture). They're so comfortable! As soon as I got home I changed.

Who knew bras could bring so much joy?!

Using the Computer

It's official. I declare myself to be huge. Why? Well, to begin, I'd first like to say that we have a laptop that we use in the livingroom. With that being said, here's why I am slowly turning into a dump truck: I can't bend over to grab something with the laptop on my lap anymore because when I do, my belly clicks the mouse pad. I bend, random things get clicked on.

That was my amazing dicovery for the day.

Blue Flowery Underwear

I think I am now obsessed with taking belly pictures. I took a couple to send to my sister so I figured I'd put them up here. Again, in my underwear (blue this time!!!!). If I wear pants it just looks like a huge belly roll. So again, enjoy me in all my glory! Haha!

20 weeks 4 days

Surgeon General's Warning

Hahaha! I saw this today on a pregnancy website I normally visit. Too funny not to share!

Warning: Surgeon's General Warning has declared that unprotected sex is hazardous to mens health. Side effects include, but are not limited to: pregnancy, children, hormonal spouses, taking care of vomit, food runs in the wee hours, constant bitchiness, loss of income, loss of sleep, not doing anything right - why can't you do anything right, doing everything right - you are an awesome man, finding out much more than you want to know about women's anatomy (which can lead to more vomiting), eating the same meal all the time, eating at odd hours of the day, shaving legs (not yours), hearing stories from other people who have children, not caring about stories from other people, having parents and adults give you advice, and discarding that advice. Pregnancy has been known to lead to home renovations, car replacements, removal of dangerous objects (porn, shot glasses, video game equipment), and much, much more. The Surgeon General suggests if you have any of these symptoms, don't panic. Instead, spend the next 9 months relishing what you used to be able to do before kids.

He Was Hiding

Well, I just got home from labor and delivery. I went in because I hadn't felt Baby move at all today (and of course he's moving now). During the past couple weeks, I've been able to feel him move really good. The past couple days I feel movement now and then, but none of the kicks he normally gives me. And today I felt nothing.

So I called Dr. Allerkamp's office. The lady on the phone said to just go to labor and delivery. So I did.

The nurse found his heartbeat right away. He's tucked way down in there.

She explained to me that my uterus has probably recently grown. So before, Baby was snugly inside my uterus. And now he's got some catching up to do. My sensations have been "numbed" so I probably can't feel him as much.

It was relieving to know that Baby's doing okay. The nurse said to eat some protien (aka PEANUT BUTTER! haha!) and lay down for a little bit in a quiet place. I should then be able to feel him move.

So that's my story for the day.

Pants

I officially broke down today. I couldn't do it anymore. It was changing my life, my personality, and my day-to-day experiences.

Pants. I bought new pants. MATERNITY PANTS!

I only tried one pair on and bought them. I had a handful of pants and didn't even bother trying the rest on. I got a pair of capris and holy shit, they're comfortable. I CAN BREATHE!

I bought them at Storkdaddy's here in Killeen. It's a little baby consignment shop. All their maternity pants were priced under $10. So guess where I'm going when I need more clothes.

I also looked around and they have cheap and cute baby outfits. And crib bedding. And bouncers. And all sorts of stuff. Really well priced. I think I found my new favorite store! Haha!

Oh.... So the name debate is still on. I told Paul the baby WILL be named Grady (I've secretly been calling him that when I talk to him). Paul says Michael. I have no problem with Grady Michael. But he wants Michael Grady. Grrrrrrr! We'll see who wins. So no name set in stone yet.

Halfway There!

Today is the start of week 20. I am officially halfway through my pregnancy. Woo hoo! We can't wait to meet you Baby!

He Felt It

Ever since I've been feeling Baby kick, I've been wanting Paul to feel it, too. We've layed together with his hand on my belly and he would feel nothing. Baby would be kicking and I'd tell him to put his hand on my belly and he would feel nothing. I was starting to get a little disappointed. Paul would always joke, "He knows better than to kick his daddy." Yeah. Okay. :-D

Well, we were laying in bed last night and the baby gave me a couple thumps real close together. I touched my belly and he gave me another good one. I told Paul, "Hurry! Put your hand on my belly!" We waited a few seconds. Then Baby kicked. A good one, too.

He got to feel it! I almost started crying. Paul doesn't show emotion too well but I know he enjoyed it.

Name Change!

Sooooooooo.............................................. We're contemplating changing the baby's name. Everyone I've spoken to thinks Bradley's a little, well, "blah". Which is fine. I'm okay with that. I was feeling awkward about saying Bradley anyways. I couldn't get it to come out of my mouth comfortably.

So I spent a few hours today going over baby names. I picked all of the ones I liked. Then Paul went back through them and took out the ones he didn't like. We had six names: Micah, Michael, Callum, Leland, Grady, and Bradley. I took each of the names and paired them up to come up with as many name combinations as possible. Then we practiced saying the names to find out which ones were weird to say or kind of ran together. We finally got them all narrowed down to three options.

Callum Grady Nebel

Grady Callum Nebel

Micah Grady Nebel

We're going to take our time and practice saying the names and calling the baby by each one. Who knows? We may end up deciding on D-Day!

It's a boy! Again!

I had my high risk appointment today in Temple. Of course, it was an ultrasound to check out Bradley and how he's developing. I know one thing for sure, he's an active little turd! He kept moving and flipping and kicking. It was so fun getting to watch him do acrobatics in my tummy.

The doctor checked out his heart, head, belly, legs, arms, feet, hands, the whole nine yards. HE'S PERFECT!

And we also got confirmation that "he" is still a "he"!! Woo hoo!!!!

Moving

I had to go to an FRG meeting last night. And it was the best meeting I've ever been to. Why? Because the baby was kicking about every 5-10 minutes. That was the first time I've ever felt him move that much. Granted, it may have had a little to do with the Sonic Blast I had eaten when I arrived. But still. I was in la-la-land the whole time. ♥

High Risk

I was at Workforce filling out an application about an hour ago when my phone started vibrating. Annoyed, I looked at it, didn't recognise the number, and turned it off so I could focus on the task at hand.

They left me a voicemail.

I finish what I was doing and before I leave the parking lot, I listen to the voicemail.

"This is So-and-so at your doctor's office calling to remind you of your appointment September 3rd. If you have any questions, call us back."

What? I don't have an appointment September 3rd. I have my big ultrasound October 6th. They must have messed up.

So I call them back.

It's my high risk appointment.

Do you know how it feels to be told you have to see a high risk doctor? I went to HEB and damn near cried through the whole store. I am truly and honest to God scared. I don't want anything to be wrong with my beautiful baby. And I feel even worse because it would be all my fault it something were to be wrong.

So Friday is my appointment. I'm nervous. I want to go but then again I don't.

I just want my beautiful baby boy.

First Belly Pic!

I finally decided to put up a belly picture. I'm starting to round out instead of looking fat. Yay! I took this just a few minutes ago after getting out of the shower. Don't mind my purple undies. Haha!

18w1d

And yes, that is a beach towel hanging on the door. I have proudly graduated today to beach towels.

Belly

You still can't tell (or at least I don't think you can) I'm pregnant. Mom says my belly already looks like a bump. I still think it looks fat. It's starting to round out a little at the bottom.

I was laying down just a little bit ago, waking up from a nap. I laid on my back with my hands on my belly. He's definitely growing big! But for once, I actually looked down at my belly while I was laying down. Instead of my belly button being the "horizon", I have more belly poking up. Does that make sense?

I thought it was really neat. And it's firm. My baby. Awwww! Haha! I'm a nutcase.

I love my baby more and more every day. ♥

Okay, we're telling!

I begged him to tell. He said yes. So I'm telling.


It's a BOY!

But like I said, the doctor was only about 80% sure. But that sure looks like a penis to me!

First Appointment

Where do I start?! I'm such a happy person right now that I don't know what to do with myself!

I had my first appointment today (17w2d) with Dr. Allerkamp. He's awesome. So far I am 100% satisfied with Scott and White doctors. They're just plain awesome.

Dr. Allerkamp estimated my due date to be January 30 or 31st. For my sanity, we'll just keep saying it's the 30th.

I was asked the normal questions of "Do you want to test for down syndrome?" and a couple other ones. I asked "If the results come back positive, is there any way you can fix the disorder?" They said no. So I said no to testing. Why am I going to put myself and my husband through that kind of stress the entire pregnancy? I won't terminate my pregnancy if the baby does have something. I'm going to love my baby the way he/she comes out, no matter what.

He gave me an ultrasound today. Woo hoo! I got to see Baby. It just kept moving and moving around in there. Baby is really active. I couldn't stop smiling. Oh, WE FOUND OUT THE GENDER! Doc is about 80% sure but judging by the picture, I'm 100% sure!

Crotch Shot!

Baby touching his/her face!

Profile

I have to go to the hospital in Temple sometime to get an "official" ultrasound. They were closed by the time my appointment got over so the doctor's office will call me tomorrow with an appointment. The lady said they probably didn't have any openings until October. Eek! Good thing I begged for an ultrasound today. And good thing the doctor was nice enough to give me one!

Oh, and since I am epileptic, Dr. Allerkamp said something about high risk pregnancy. Honestly, I forgot his exact words because I was in baby heaven. But I'll probably update about that later on.

I chose to have the baby at Metroplex. A) It's closer. B) Dr. Allerkamp is on call there more than in Temple so my chances of seeing him are much better.

So yeah, I'm as happy as a hog right now. Yay! Baby!

I'm Done!!!!!!

THIS IS THE LAST TIME I'M CHANGING IT!

Paul's been obsessed with the Winnie the Pooh decor for Baby's room, so Winnie the Pooh it is. I already changed everything in the registry... again. This is finalized and I am NOT changing it again. Men. I swear! They need to learn how to make up their minds. Grrrrr!

So.... officially.... officially, officially, officially.... IT IS WINNIE THE POOH!

Quizzes

I took some quizzes "just because". The first one is labor prediction. The rest are gender prediction. Here's what I got:






http://www.justmommies.com/quizzes/labor-results.php

Get your bags packed early just in case you need them. Make sure your partner has a phone available when he's away because this baby just might come early. We predict your baby will come 2-3 weeks early. Your baby will most likely be born in the morning. Justmommies predicts that your baby will weigh approximately 7.5 pounds and that your labor will be about 12 hours long.



http://www.childbirth.org/cgi-bin/boyorgirl.pl

You have a 71% chance of having a boy.
And you have a 28% chance of having a girl.



http://www.parents.com/pregnancy/signs/quiz/baby-gender-prediction/

Based on your answers, it is too close to tell what gender your baby will be. It could be a girl or a boy!



http://www.babyzone.com/pregnancy/fetal_development/genetics_gender/quiz/having-boy-or-girl?q10=3&quizid=77&QuestionCount=10&CurrentPage=11&ReturnURL=&q1=3&q2=3&q3=2&q4=3&q5=2&q6=1&q7=3&q8=3&q9=1&submit.x=22&submit.y=9

Your Type is: 3

1- It Could Be a Boy!

According to old wives' tales, a number of things indicate that you might be having a boy: carrying high and out front, conceiving at the time of ovulation (and in a position involving deep penetration), eating a potassium-rich diet, having mild morning-only sickness, a fetal heartbeat that's less than 130 beats per minute, and looking more beautiful. As the old saying goes, "Boys give beauty, girls take it away." Learn more pregnancy myths.


2- It Could Be a Girl
According to old wives' tales, a number of things indicate that you might be having a girl: carrying low and wide, conceiving just before the time of ovulation (and in a position involving shallow penetration), eating a magnesium-rich diet, having severe morning sickness (that can last all day long), a fetal heartbeat that's more than 140 beats per minute, and looking less beautiful. We're pretty sure that Angelina Jolie (mom of Shiloh) would disagree with the old saying, "Boys give beauty, girls take it away." Learn more pregnancy myths.


3- Can't Tell
It sounds like it's too early to put these old wives' tales to the test. Try again soon!

A Little Bit of Everything

Oh, boy. Where do I start? It's been a long couple weeks.

Monday, August 9th, Uncle Dale was in a fatal motorcycle accident so that sent my life (and the rest of the family's) into a whirlwind. I had never cried so hard in my life and I never want to cry like that again. The next day the top of my uterus had felt like I did a hundred crunches. It hurt. After resting a whole day in the car (because we drove to Iowa on Tuesday) I felt much better. By the end of the week and after many tears, I decided to go to the emergency room in Nebraska City just to check up on the baby. I wasn't having any symptoms such as cramping or bleeding. I just wasn't eating right, had the poops, and was under a ton of stress. And I know stress is not good for the baby. I got to hear his/her heartbeat. The first nurse couldn't find it. Then a student came in to find it. She found it for a second or so and then lost it. Then the doctor came in and in a completely different spot he found it. Good God the baby had a nice and strong heartbeat. I was laughing and crying at the same time. It was just what I needed. It was almost as if I melted into another world for that small moment. If I remember correctly, the student measured the heartbeat at 138.

Sleeping is much more complex now. I feel as though I have a 20 pound weight belt strapped to my waist. I don't get crushed if I lay on my back yet. But if I turn to the side, I have to have major support. My belly just feels so heavy. And I love waking up in the morning now. My uterus is hard as a rock when I wake up and I can feel all around it. It's so cool!

I felt the baby kick while I was standing up for the very first time the other day. Some say it feels like butterflies. Mine feels like a quick little muscle spazm. I don't feel the baby very often. It's still awfully early.

Paul and I went to Walmart the other day. We happened to go through the baby aisle. He finally realized how much baby stuff costs. Oh, and guess what else! ...He fell in love with the Pooh Bear stroller/swing/etc. Here we go again......

One more thing......... I'm leaning towards thinking "he" is a "she".

My belly

My belly hasn't "popped" yet, but I know it's getting close. I can feel the top of my uterus a couple inches below my belly button. I lay down and my belly's just.. well... there. You can't tell yet from just looking. But I can definitely tell from feeling. Especially at night. When I wake up to pee and go lay in bed again, it just pokes out all hard and stuff. But anywho. Back to "popping". So I can feel it getting larger. One of these days my belly's not going to be able to hold the weight anymore. I can't wait to be round instead of just fat. Haha!

Gender

Like I've said a hundred times before, we're not telling the gender of Baby. And, as I said before, I don't want to find out but Paul does.

But I've been contemplating. I kind of do want to find out. I want to look at and buy baby stuff but I always find stuff that is gender-specific. Like today, we saw the cutest sign to hang on the wall if baby were to be a girl. And I've found cute boy stuff, too.

I can't decide! I want the big surprise on delivery day but holy cow, I want to know so bad right now! Aaah!

I've got some thinking to do....

Movement?

I was laying on the couch at Mom and Dad's last night. And being my normal self, I farted. Shortly after I farted, I felt this "bubbling" on the left side. Was it more gas coming in? Was it the baby fluttering around in there? I honestly think it was the baby. I'm not new to the world of "gas" and this was a bubbling like I've never felt before. I hope it was baby kicking. I can't wait until it happens again. This just reassures that my little one is growing good and being really active.

Room Decor

So I'm going to make the decor for Baby's room. We have finally settled on a western theme. I made and got my very first baby item a couple days ago. I made a fleece blanket, one side cowprint, the other white. I can't wait to make other stuff!

I also received a crib, changing table, and dresser from Courtney. I can't thank her enough.

And as we all know, I can't possibly keep a post on one topic. So here's a little TMI (too much information) for all of you fellow readers: I bought my first box of breast pads yesterday. My damn boob leaks. Not all the time. Just if there's a certain amount of pressure on it (like if I lean against something). I was bra-less yesterday (no I was not in public) after I woke up. I had a tiny wet spot on the front of my shirt. What the.... ? So I decided to buy a box so I don't start ruining clothes.

So.......

So I'm thinking about completely changing the theme of the room again. I know! I know! I need to make up my mind.

But I got to thinking about it, and the baby's not going to be paying attention to what the decor is. I don't need some designer-made crap.

Paul REALLY wants a "cowboy" type theme. So I think I'm going to go to a linen shop and make my own blankets and curtains. And I'll find some stuffed animals to decorate the room with. And maybe paint a cow-print border or something.

I know this is something my husband really, really wants. And he doesn't say much in the way of how things should go. I want to make sure he gets what he wants.

On another note...

I finally got my ob/gyn. Dr. Allercamp (I don't think that's spelled right) from Scott and White. I don't have an appointment until August 24th. I'll be 17 weeks. I can't wait to see my baby again!

Oh, and I've lost 15 pounds. I normally weight 201-215. I never had morning sickness. I eat like I did before. When I do decide to weigh myself, I do it immediately after I take my first pee when I wake up. It's been a week or so since I weighed myself and the scale said 200. I don't even remember the last time I weighed 200 pounds!

Sacrafice

One thing is for sure: babies cost money.

With that being said, Paul and I just made a sacrafice to ensure we save money. Our average DirecTV bill is about $72.00 a month. Our promotion has ended. I threat to cancel and they can give me free dvr service. Oooh! $5.00 a month. Woopeeeee! Not.

Paul got Netflix the other day and has been watching it unlimited on the Xbox. In HD. For only $10.00 a month.

Granted Netflix doesn't have brand new stuff every single day and gazillions of channels to watch, it'll still do the trick for us. We want to make sure we save as much money as we can so we can be parents that are able to provide for their children. We don't want to be greedy. We're now dedicated to someone else. Our baby will get everything he or she ever needs.

Bye bye DirecTV!

Guessing Game

As you all know (or maybe you don't), we will not be telling the sex of the baby. And of course, won't know the weight, length, etc until he or she is born. So I made a game for everyone to guess the stats of the baby. Feel free to enter your best guess now or later (the game will be closed probably a couple weeks before the due date). The winner will receive a prize. Whoever has the least amount of points wins. Good luck!

http://www.expectnet.com/games/BabyNebelStats

Stuff

Call me crazy or call me excited, I don't care, but I got our baby registry done (I think) at Walmart. We have a safari theme with lions, and tigers, and bears, oh my! It's really cute. I finally got Paul to give me some input and he liked that theme. So that's what we're doing. I can't wait until we can start putting stuff in Baby's room! Yay!

On another note... I'm still waiting for my referral to my ob/gyn. I called my physician's office the other day and they said the referral went through and the ob would call me. I haven't received a call yet. So I called Tricare today to check on the referral. They said there was nothing entered in for a referral since October of 2009. He didn't even show a referral to Dr. Winceck at Scott and White. Odd. So I'm going to call the doctor's office again Monday since they decided to go on vacation this past week. I haven't had an ultrasound since the beginning of week 7. I'll be at least 13 weeks by the time I get an appointment in. Something needs to get done quickly. What if something happens? I need a doctor!

Pain

My hips are aching quite often now. I sleep with a pillow between my legs and I partially roll over on top of another one. That gets me comfy in bed, at least. But during the night and often throughout the day, particularly in certain sitting positions, my hips ache. I can't exactly explain it. It's almost a dull throbbing ache. Quite uncomfortable. I feel like I have a vice attached to each hip, and I am getting pulled apart. I thought my hips were big enough already. I hope they don't get too much bigger!

Holy Crap

Holy crap do I have to crap. Constipation has finally set in noticeably within the past week. I couldn't have a nice healthy shit if my life depended on it. I can get out a couple marble sized turds and that's about it. I was telling Paul in bed the other night, "I have to fart, but every time I do, it feels like I'm going to poop, so I try not to, so it feels like I have to fart all the time." MAKE IT GO AWAY! I never thought I'd miss pooping. But I do.

Second Trimester Approaching

Soon I will be in my second trimester. I am currently 10 weeks and 3 days. I feel as though it's already time for me to "recap" my first trimester.

I had bouts of nausea but that was only a couple times. I never did get sick. Naps were a must-have every day, for at least 2 hours. Bed time was at 9 pm.

And that pretty much sums it up. Hahaha!

What's different so far? No nausea (but I really didn't have any in the first place). I can, for the most part, deal with not having a nap. And I've been able to stay up past 10 the past few nights. Woo hoo!

Second trimester, here I come!

It's Official

We officially have names picked out. Woo hoo!!!!!

*drum roll please*

Renata Elyse Nebel and Bradley Michael Nebel

Aaah! Relief!

It's been raining outside off and on. Very warm and humid, but not shorts weather. So I put on my jeans. Oh my God they hurt! I couldn't breathe when I buttoned them up. So I unbuttoned and halfway unzipped them, then tucked the flaps in. If that didn't make me feel fat, I don't know what could have.

So I went to Target and got a belly band. I tried it on in the dressing room and didn't take it off. I just walked to the checkout with the package (which surprises me because the checkout girl didn't say anything to me about the package being empty..... hmm.... ). I got white so it will look like I have a tank top on under my shirt if it does happen to show. My God, I've never felt so much relief in my life. I can get bloated and full and still be comfortable in my pants. I feel kind of rediculous because no one can tell I'm pregnant, but I can tell. And I feel like a fat ass in my jeans.

I took some before and after pictures. I hope they amuse you.

BEFORE

My flaps are tucked in.

They're simply unbuttoned.

AFTER

With the belly band on. It not only flattens my unbuttoned jeans, but smoothes my curvy lovehandles. Yay!

Stop Crying!!!!

We went on a fishing trip with a couple friends last night. I had tons of fun. Fished (if you consider casting the line a couple times then handing the pole to my husband cuz I'm bored "fishing"), swam, and most of all I relaxed.

On our way out to the lake, we had to stop to get munchies and drinks. We first stopped at a tiiiiiiny gas station. I had already picked out a Slim Jim and a couple other things. Everybody else wanted to go to a bigger gast station because there wasn't much there they wanted. I asked the female of the other couple that was with us if I could at leasy buy my Slim Jim. She looked at me and jokingly but stern says, "No." I started crying in the middle of the gas station because I wanted a frickin Slim Jim!

Then later on after we'd fished for a while, they finally caught a fish (with my pretty orange fake worm I picked out, might I add). They guy of the other couple pulled out his knife and was going to chop it up and use it as bait. I was screaming at him and telling him no. He was nice and goes out of sight to cut the fish up. I started crying!

Really?! I'm getting tired of these tears. I cry over stupid stuff. Ugh! Just a few more weeks and the second trimester will be here and hopefully I won't be crazy!

Dreams

Lately I've been having weird dreams. Like 3 a night. They're crazy. Every once in a while I'll dream but I wake up to each of these and start talking to my husband telling him to do something.

I dreamed I was driving on WS Young up to Rancier and was going to hang a right at the stop light. I was in the truck. Then all of a sudden the tire blew on the truck. So I woke Paul up telling him to go outside because the tire's flat.

I dreamed I was trying to breastfeed the baby for the first time. Paul didn't believe I was making milk for the baby so I had to squirt him with it.

I dreamed Angel peed in the living room next to the fish tank. And the pee was flowing (yes flowing, it was alot of pee) toward the electrical stuff for the fish tank. I woke Paul up and told him to hurry into the living room because one of the animals just peed and it's running. He cracked the door open and looked and said "I'll get it tomorrow."

I dreamed Angel was throwing up a cat. I was sitting in the living room on the couch and she was in the dining room and I was watching her trying to puke. She puked once and a white cat leg was dangling out of her mouth. She tried puking some more. Then I woke up.

I know there have been some other weird things. But that's what my crazy head has come up with for now.

I'm going to die.

Holy hell do I have a migraine! It's like the past week, every day, I get a headache. But today sucks. Boooo! I have to work tonight but don't want to go. I've layed on the couch all day today. My head hurts if I don't look anywhere but straight ahead in little to no light. Ugh!

Weird occurence earlier...... So I though I had my first real food craving the other day for Whoppers. Nope. Today was it. I was sitting on the couch eating Goldfish. And I wanted peanut butter to dip my Goldfish in. I looked at Paul and started crying because I wanted peanut butter. Being the good husband he is, he went to the cabinet and got me a brand new jar of PB. What a man! ♥

Belly

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...... ☺

I know I'm chubby so I have a fat indent between my belly and "pooch" I guess you could say. I looked in the mirror about half an hour ago. My indent is not-so-dented. It still is a little bit but not as much. Yay! And I know I'm not constipated cuz... well, yeah.... And I know constipation can make you look more pregnant than you actually are. I'm not bloated. I feel the least bloated that I've felt in the past month. Soooo.... I'm hoping it's baby! Okay, well maybe uterus. But still..... Yay!

Just thought I'd share.

Should I be scared?

I don't feel pregnant. I don't feel anything. My boobs don't hurt. I don't feel sick. I don't feel a baby belly. I don't feel anything. Is that normal? It's freaking me out. I think I'm going to call my doctor tomorrow. I don't know. Uuuuuuuuugh!

First Ultrasound

I had my very first ultrasound June 15th. Even though the baby doesn't look much like a baby yet, he/she is still the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

I got my new due date. It is now 1/30/2011. During the ultrasound I was 7 weeks 2 days. Tomorrow I will be exactly 8 weeks. So every Sunday I gain a week. Baby's heartbeat was 145 beats per minute. I love my beautiful baby.

I finally got a call from my neurologist yesterday. My medicine dosage has to go up already. I was taking 100mg of Lamictal in the morning and 100mg at night. Starting tonight, for two weeks, I take 100mg in the morning and 150mg at night. Then thereafter, I take 100mg in the morning and 200mg at night.

I've been starting to get nausea. Yesterday it wasn't extremely bad but I'm not used to it so I didn't fare too well. All day and night I felt like crap. And all I wanted to do was sleep. Today I've been feeling "blah" too. I bought some ginger snap cookies last night, so when I feel icky, I eat a few cookies. It kind of helps. I probably don't eat enough, though.

My appetite has gone down. I don't eat as much as I did. I want to, but can't. One thing I absolutely love to eat is salad. Some baby spinach, with ranch dressing, cheddar cheese, and croutons. Yummy!

I had an emotional breakdown a couple days ago. I had a VERY long day at work and was looking forward to coming home to my husband. He wasn't home (and no he didn't just up and disappear, he texted me and told me where he was going). Boy, oh boy, did I freak out on him. All I did all night was cry and scream at him. I couldn't stop. I woke up to swollen eyes because I cried so hard. I even cried quite a bit that day, too. I've become an emotional roller coaster.

Lately I've been contemplating what I'm going to do before and after the baby is born. I have two states of mind. At one moment I keep thinking I'm going to work as long as I can and when I have the baby, I'm going to stay home with him/her and take online and evening classes. The jobs I can get now will only pay for daycare so it'll be pointless for me to work. On the other hand, I want to take a phlebotomy course this fall so I can get a decent paying job after I take maternity leave. But if I go to school now, it'll take away from my hours at work and it'll cost money for me to drive back and forth and for books and all that other stuff. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. School starts August 30, so I don't have too long to think about it. Ugh! What to do. What to do.

Oh, one more thing. Did I mention my boobs are getting big? Like, huge! I'm already falling out of my bras. Time to go bra shopping.